Bwompus V.I.P Member
Number of posts : 541 Age : 54 Location : 38° 1′ 47″ N, 84° 29′ 41″ W Job/hobbies : ZOMBIES!!, Horror movies, aquariums, fishing, drag racing, 4 wheeling, camping, etc etc Humor : lots Thank You Points : 5 Registration date : 2010-02-08
| Subject: The Man Rules. Tue Apr 06, 2010 12:07 pm | |
| The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down .
Finally,the guys' side of the story. (must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear"the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!
1.Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine..Really
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. | |
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Curby The Boss
Number of posts : 3597 Age : 42 Location : Wigan UK Job/hobbies : Manager Humor : Comedian Thank You Points : 77 Registration date : 2008-12-26
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Kurosaki J V.I.P Member
Number of posts : 1496 Age : 47 Location : Down the boozer Thank You Points : 23 Registration date : 2009-01-22
| Subject: Re: The Man Rules. Tue Apr 06, 2010 9:28 pm | |
| I'm liking your style Bwompus. J | |
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familyman03 Fish Egg
Number of posts : 11 Location : Bakersfield, CA Thank You Points : 0 Registration date : 2010-06-28
| Subject: Re: The Man Rules. Thu Mar 03, 2011 9:11 pm | |
| this is excellent i think i will post it on my wall | |
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Steve5495 Fish Egg
Number of posts : 17 Age : 61 Location : Clearwater Fl. Job/hobbies : Aquarium service Humor : dry Thank You Points : 0 Registration date : 2010-03-03
| Subject: Nice Tue Feb 21, 2012 1:37 pm | |
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Jeff Large Bristlenose
Number of posts : 307 Age : 54 Location : Calgary AB Canada Job/hobbies : Semi-retired / Lord of the Rings Online Humor : dry Thank You Points : 17 Registration date : 2011-09-07
| Subject: Re: The Man Rules. Tue Feb 21, 2012 2:26 pm | |
| Thanx for the laughs! | |
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jim.and V.I.P Member
Number of posts : 1449 Age : 67 Location : England Job/hobbies : Warehouse Op Thank You Points : 107 Registration date : 2010-08-04
| Subject: Re: The Man Rules. Tue Feb 21, 2012 11:29 pm | |
| Love it | |
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mmccannon Large Bristlenose
Number of posts : 346 Age : 55 Location : Hungary Thank You Points : 17 Registration date : 2011-05-16
| Subject: Re: The Man Rules. Wed Feb 22, 2012 11:09 am | |
| Love it, but none of them applies to me, since I do not bother on ups/downs, do/don't, etc. Especially, since I started fishing on a large scale (~ 1300 litre altogether). So, I am an outcast | |
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